Today I became a 51 year old man i’m so confused what do i do now when they say listen to your elders.

first is I can’t hear my elders

there are only about two people older.

I beleave older often is not always wiser.

but most of the time we have experienced the mistakes before.

listen up you young guys and gals were only going to tell you it once after that your on your own.

Dear Ma and Pa,

I am well. Hope you are
Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps
sure beats working for old man Minch by a mile.
Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 AM. but I am getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot,
and shine some things.

No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay.
Practically nothing.

All Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there’s warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon,
etc.,
but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie
and other regular food,

But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live
on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon when you get fed
again.

It’s no wonder these city boys can’t walk much. We go on “route marches,”
which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us.

If he thinks so, it’s not my place to tell him different.
A “route march” is about as far as to our mailbox at home.

Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

This will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing.
I keep getting medals for shooting.
I don’t know why.
The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don’t move,
and it
ain’t shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home.
All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it.
You don’t even load your own cartridges.
They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training.
You get to wrestle with them city boys.

I have to be real careful though, they break real easy.
It ain’t like fighting with that ole bull at home

I’m about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan
from over in Silver Lake.
I only beat him once.
He joined up the same time as me, but I’m only 5?6? and 130 pounds and
he’s 6?8? and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get
onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,

THE WEDDING NIGHT

THE WEDDING NIGHT

Fred and Mary get married but couldn’t afford a honeymoon, so they go
back to Fred’s Mom and Dad’s house for their first night
together. In the morning, Johnny, Fred’s little brother, gets
up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to
school, he asks his mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. She replies,
‘No’.

Johnny asks, ‘Do you know what I think?’

His mom replies, ‘I don’t want to hear what you think! Just go to
school.’

Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, ‘Are Fred and Mary up
yet?’

She replies, ‘No.’

Johnny says, ‘Do you know what I think?’

His mom replies, ‘Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go
back to school ‘

After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, ‘Are Fred and Mary up
yet?’

His mom says, ‘No.’

He asks, ‘Do you know what I think?’

His mom replies, ‘Ok, now tell me what you think?’

He says: ‘Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I
think… I gave him my airplane glue.

DOT The way life should be.

Today I went to Waterford to talk with a lady who loves the deer.

She asked if the DOT could move the deer crossing signs to a safer place for the deer to cross.

They seem to get hit while crossing in that corner she said.

(truth)